For the longest time, I have wanted to create a YouTube channel. Not just any channel, but something that really feels like me. I have had a channel before, sure, but I have never made a proper video that was personal, expressive, or creatively mine from start to finish.
I have watched so many creators do amazing things, and I feel like I know how to make something worthwhile. I have built up solid skills in filmmaking, graphic design, and editing. All the tools are there. But the part I struggle with is choosing the subject. Deciding what kind of video I want to make.
What I really want is for the channel to be a form of self-expression. An artistic outlet. A space to explore ideas I care about, maybe something poetic, thoughtful, or a little experimental. Not made for the algorithm, but made for the process. For the joy of creating something honest.
But my brain has other plans. It spirals. Overthinks. I get so caught up in wanting to make something perfect that I forget to just enjoy the act of making. I start chasing the ideal result before even hitting record.
Recently, I watched a video called “Why Wait?” that really hit home. It talked about how we often delay starting. We wait for the right time, the perfect idea, or some big moment that finally pushes us forward. But that moment rarely comes. We just keep waiting.
And then, of course, there are all the internet gurus shouting “Just do it” like it is the easiest thing in the world. They wear rose-tinted glasses, sometimes literally, and preach hustle and creation like it is a mantra. Honestly, it just puts me off. That pressure to be relentlessly productive feels hollow.
Still, I know I want to make something. Something expressive. Not for likes or views, just a reflection of how I see the world. Something small, maybe poetic, maybe about growth. Or even about this exact feeling of being stuck but wanting to start.
I do not know where this will go.
I do not even know where to begin.
But maybe starting without knowing is the whole point.